Growing up there’s always someone that grabs your attention. You can’t recall the exact moment but you just know all of a sudden they were your focus in life and you had never been happier.
Ana grew up as a princess and she was always told one day her king would come. Little did she know there would be many princes wanting to marry her. She was cute, but she wasn’t the prettiest girl in the kingdom. I think what made her so desirable was her courageousness to try whatever she wanted. It was hard for a man to find a woman that would be his wife and friend. Up until recently it was frowned upon for a woman to participate in the same pastimes as a man. That didn’t stop Ana though. She was so anxious to try everything she had been told not to her entire life. She loved running through the woods, shooting animals with her bow and arrows, riding horses, trying on armor and pretend to fight with different weapons.
Her brothers found her behavior absurd and they couldn’t help but tell their friends about her when they went out. Due to the big mouths of her brothers, all the men in the kingdom and some men from surrounding kingdoms had heard of Ana. Ana’s father was so pleased there were multiple men that wanted to marry his daughter. Mostly because he thought he could benefit from all the gifts the men would give him. He asked for crazy things that he didn’t need like a statue of himself made out of chocolate, a rare thing to find in their area.
Man after man came by their castle giving Ana’s father gifts trying to impress him. Until one day Rama, a prince that he had heard was incredibly strong, came by. Ana’s father was gifted a bow long ago but he was never that athletic, plus he couldn’t pick it up. He was sure this young man could get rid of this stupid bow so he asked him to break it. Without a sweat the young man picked it up and broke it and a large thunderbolt came down from the sky. Ana’s father could not believe he broke it. That bow was from a god!
As Ana was being given to Rama, Parashurama appeared out of nowhere. Parashurama was an avatar of the god Vishnu and he was taller than all the castles in the kingdom! He exclaimed that Ana should be his wife and no one else's. When her father asked what he could give him he replied with wealth, so of course Ana's father accepted. A hard lesson he would learn, though, was that having all the money in the world could not give you happiness.
Ana was devastated her father gave her to Parashurama. She fell in love with Rama the moment she saw his face. Nonetheless, Parashurama was to be her husband. She decided to make the best of the situation and try to become friends with Parashurama. Thankfully once you got through his tough guy front he was actually a nice and sweet guy. They talked for hours getting to know one another. Parashurama took Ana on the coolest adventures. She didn’t think of it before but how cool is it that her husband can fly wherever he wants? He can also throw lighting bolts, and help her reach high places like the tops of waterfalls!
Ana got just what she wanted after all. She was married to her best friend.
Bibliography: This story comes from the PDE version of Ramayana
Author's note: I got this idea as I was reading the Ramayana. In the original story Rama wins Sita as his wife by breaking the bow. Parashurama comes in just to yell at them for breaking the bow.
While reading this I thought why doesn’t Parashurama take Sita as his own wife? After all he was obviously the biggest and strongest of the men at Sita’s swayamvara. He was depicted as bigger than a giant! He was incredibly large compared to everyone else surrounding him in the pictures. So I incorporated that in my story!
Ana was devastated her father gave her to Parashurama. She fell in love with Rama the moment she saw his face. Nonetheless, Parashurama was to be her husband. She decided to make the best of the situation and try to become friends with Parashurama. Thankfully once you got through his tough guy front he was actually a nice and sweet guy. They talked for hours getting to know one another. Parashurama took Ana on the coolest adventures. She didn’t think of it before but how cool is it that her husband can fly wherever he wants? He can also throw lighting bolts, and help her reach high places like the tops of waterfalls!
Ana got just what she wanted after all. She was married to her best friend.
Bibliography: This story comes from the PDE version of Ramayana
Author's note: I got this idea as I was reading the Ramayana. In the original story Rama wins Sita as his wife by breaking the bow. Parashurama comes in just to yell at them for breaking the bow.
While reading this I thought why doesn’t Parashurama take Sita as his own wife? After all he was obviously the biggest and strongest of the men at Sita’s swayamvara. He was depicted as bigger than a giant! He was incredibly large compared to everyone else surrounding him in the pictures. So I incorporated that in my story!
One of the reasons I thought of this “there’s always someone bigger/better topic” was because the Texas slogan “everything is bigger and better in Texas” was a topic of conversation at my house the day before I wrote my story. Bigger doesn’t always mean better but for Sita’s sake I wanted it to, so I made Parashurama a nice and friendly husband. Another reason is I thought of how whenever most people compete for something at a young age it’s like out of nowhere here comes someone older and “bigger and better.” That definitely happened to me when I was younger.
The picture was my main source for showing just how much bigger Parashurama was than Rama. While reading the Ramayana, this image stood out to me because I didn’t visualize just how big Parashurama was until I saw it. It is part of a bigger picture of everyone that was at the swayamvara. I wanted to just focus of these two since they were the main subject of my story.
I chose the story of Parashurama from the Ramayana to write my story over because I thought that it was a little odd for Rama to be so idolized at the swayamvara when there was another avatar of Vishnu there as well. Even after Rama showed Parashurama his strength I still thought what is stopping this guy from doing whatever he wants?
The picture was my main source for showing just how much bigger Parashurama was than Rama. While reading the Ramayana, this image stood out to me because I didn’t visualize just how big Parashurama was until I saw it. It is part of a bigger picture of everyone that was at the swayamvara. I wanted to just focus of these two since they were the main subject of my story.
I chose the story of Parashurama from the Ramayana to write my story over because I thought that it was a little odd for Rama to be so idolized at the swayamvara when there was another avatar of Vishnu there as well. Even after Rama showed Parashurama his strength I still thought what is stopping this guy from doing whatever he wants?
I really enjoyed reading your story this week! I liked how you used the more traditional names throughout the story. I also liked that you put a twist on the traditional Ramayana because you thought the two paired better together. I agree that the biggest and the strongest should have taken Sita as his own wife after reading your story. I also liked your ending, it left me wanting a little bit more information about the story which is always what keeps readers coming back for more. I can't wait to see what else you write about this semester!
ReplyDeleteThanks Maddie! Ya, I definitely could have spent more time on my ending. I'm glad you still liked it though!
DeleteHi Mariah, your idea has inspired me to think way further out of the box than I was previously doing. As for the critique, lets start with the first paragraph, I get what you are saying but you might consider rewording it just a little to make the presentation smoother. You were alluding to a person becoming important to you in an unexpected way. Perhaps a love interest that started out as a person that you would not have thought of in that way or perhaps just a very close friend that you never thought would be the type of person with whom you could relate.
ReplyDeleteI like how you created this vision of the girl-next-door, maybe even a tomboy huntress. You seemed to elude to her highest dream to be able to marry her best friend. I that is the theme that could be part of your big finish.
What if, she was in the forest alone and runs into Parashurma, and they develop a friendship through the shared love of hunting. Then, when he shows up there can be this whole upset moment between Rama and Parashurma. Perhaps a rivalry could grow between Rama and Parashurma as a result of this meeting. The father was very impressed with Rama, what he can be bought off and refuses Parashurma. What if a fight scene took place as soon as Parashurma announced his undying love for her? What if a fight resulted in a terrible injury to one and she is forced to go with the one she is not attracted to, but as she grows to hate her husband sets him up for an overthrow with her true love?
Anyways, I liked how creative you were to totally change up the story, I am definitely doing that on my next story.
Rhino, thank you so much for the awesome feedback! Those are things I never thought of that could make the story better. I will definitely make some of these revisions as I continue to work on this story as the semester goes on. I'm glad I could inspire you in your story writing as well.
DeleteI loved this story about Ana and her father’s quest to find her a husband. I really liked how you made Ana different from the average girl in the village. I loved her sense of adventure and desire to try all the things she had been told not to her whole life. I thought that was a unique spin on the traditional female characters found in the Ramayana. I did not expect Parashurama to take Ana to be his wife! I was beginning to draw the parallels between your story and the Ramayana but when you said Parashurama decided to take her for yourself I was shocked! I love that twist on the sequence of events. I also liked that you made Parashurama a good husband to Ana. Since she had fallen in love with Rama, I was afraid she would have become unhappy but I enjoyed reading about how they got to know each other and developed a loving relationship.
ReplyDeleteThank you Lindsey! As I have read the traditional stories I have wanted a female character that has been more adventurous and assertive. I'm glad the story surprised you, that is what I wanted the readers to feel.
DeleteThis story reminded me of arranged marriages, but how sometimes they work out. Your story made me laugh when you talked about a statue made out of chocolate—that’s definitely an over the top request. My favorite part of the entire story was your ending! I feel like a lot of the classic stories do not end with a happy ending, but yours did! I loved that feeling of leaving off with a good note when a happy ending seems impossible. Something I was a bit curious about was how Rama felt about your main character. You could add a mini paragraph explaining his side of the story if you wanted. Other than that, I loved this story. It had a little bit of everything, and I loved the twists and turns. I also liked that you included Rama breaking the bow in your story. I look forward to more your writing!
ReplyDeleteThat is a great idea Dhara! Thank you!
DeleteI enjoyed reading your story. When I was first reading it I liked that Ana was able to do all the things these men were, and instead of being ridiculed for it, she was overwhelmed with flattery. I also like how you incorporated the avatar of Vishnu into your story. After reading your author's note, I thought it was even more clever that you had thought of that. I liked the plot twist you threw in the story. I also LOVED that it ended happily. However, just to spice up the story more, I would just add maybe a battle between Rama and Parashurama to win over Ana. You said in your story that all the money in the world could not give the father happiness and that is a lesson he would have to learn. Maybe elaborate on this more. I did think you did a great job and look forward to reading more of your stories.
ReplyDeleteI'm so happy to hear that the author's note made it better! I'm glad you enjoyed reading the story. Thank you for the feedback
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